RedHotSocial Adult Dating Site Blog - The Best Ways to Get Started with Phone Sex
Once you’ve hooked up with a partner from an online casual dating site, the obvious next step is to get into exchanging erotic texts, and start some sexting sessions. Once you’ve had your fair share of flirty, dirty sexting messages, you’ll probably migrate onto phone sex sessions. With tech these days this can either be blind over the phone or using video calls such as Facetime. Just remember to be clear on the rules if you are deciding to get naked on video with someone new.
It’s completely normal for some people to feel a little unsure on where to pitch the start of phone sex sessions. You might feel self conscious about how sexy you are going to sound, or what to say that won’t sound corny and will give someone else the horn. Ashley Manta, author of A Feminist’s Guide to Phone Sex explains that ‘identifying and articulating our sexual needs is a learned skill that takes practice’. Rather than going in cold and hoping for the best, it’s a good idea to make a plan before making that call. Here’s a little bit of prep you could do before you start your phone sex session. Once you get the hang of it, it’ll soon be plain sailing!
For example this could include role play. Think about the sort of role play you want, and you want to hear about, what sort of actions in the role play do you want to happen. If it’s hearing about what sort of masterbation you want to hear about or you’d like to act out, jot this down too and how it is going to make you feel, so you can verbalise it. Maybe think of a sexy task you’d like to do or hear about or see being done.
Before you dial, make sure you’ve got your area set up and you’re not likely to be interrupted by anyone wandering in. Put on whatever you like that helps to make you feel horny and ready for sex. Think about the lighting and music you’d like to have on in the background. Make sure you have your props and accessories to hand, charged up sex toys and plenty of lubrication. Don’t forget to also ensure your phone is fully charged or has access to being charged. You wouldn’t want to get cut off in your stride.
Our brains are the most poweful sex organ we have. The key to good phone sex is the ability to paint the picture to such an extent that the sexual fantasy comes to life. Crafting some words and phrases that you’re happy to say without feeling awkward can be really helpful and make sure you don’t get stuck. Think about words that will describe what you’re doing, what you’re imagining and how you’re feeling.
Like any phone conversation, it needs to be a two way process. Make sure you take the time to listen carefully to what’s being said, and respond to it. If you hear breathing getting faster, you’re hitting the right buttons.
Responding in a low voice, or a whisper always sounds more sexy, as do moans and groans, so if you’re lost for words, let the moaning and deep breathing take over. It still does the trick to keep the momentum going.
It might be that you mutually masturbate during your phone sex sessions, but don’t expect it to be a requirement. It also shouldn’t always be about reaching the big orgasm, and feel worried if one or both of you fail to reach climax. Orgasms can be optional, and shouldn’t be considered as the only goal of the phone sex call.
